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When You Pray, Forgive
by Alexander White

There is no subject that our Lord returns to so often as the forgiveness of injuries. The reason for that may very well be because our lives are so full of injuries, both real and supposed, and both given and received. It may also be because the thoughts and the feelings, the words and the deeds, that injury awakens towards one another in our hearts, are so opposed to His mind and His spirit.

It is remarkable that in the prayer our Lord taught His disciples, the only petition He repeats and underscores is the fifth: Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us (see Matthew 6:12). No sooner has He said Amen than He takes His disciples back again to their "trespasses," and warns them in these solemn and arresting words: "For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father also will forgive you; but if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses" (Matthew 6:14-15, RSV).

This is as much as saying, "Forgiveness will be the hardest of all the holy attitudes that I shall ever have to ask of you. Spite and ill will are the most difficult of all the heart's sinful motions to subdue."

The Need for Self-Examination
The Lord says, "whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone" (Mark 11:25, RSV). The next time you "stand praying," and are as yet unable to forgive, say something like this to yourself: What exactly is it that I have against that man? Put it in words. Put it to yourself as you would put it to a third person, using calm reflection, with a little frank and honest self-examination.

Once you have asked this question, and looked at the matter this way, that mortal offense turns out to be not half so bad as you have felt it to be up until now. Our pride, and our self-importance, often blow up a small matter into a mortal injury. Many of our insults and injuries are far more imaginary than real, though our sin and our misery on account of them are real enough.

Look at the offender. Look closely at him. Do not avoid him. Do not refuse to have a talk with him. If possible, eat a meal now and then with him. Make a great and noble effort, and put yourself in his place in all this unhappy business. Be honest, and just, and generous.

See yourself as he has seen you. Allow and admit his side of it for a moment. allow and admit that you differ from him quite as much as he differs from you.

Let a little daylight fall on this case that is between him and you. Let a little of the light of love, and humility, and goodwill fall on him, and on yourself?and already your prayer is heard!

You may go on and finish your prayer now. Your trespasses are already forgiven. And you are ready to admit that a great part of your hurt and pain and anger and resentment is due to yourself, and not to your neigbhor at all.

The Christ-Like Heart
How horrible, and how hell-like, is a revengeful heart! But how beautiful, and how like Heaven itself, is a humble, a meek, a patient, and a Christ-like heart! "Blessed are you when men revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on My account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in Heaven." (Matthew 5:11-12, RSV)

Our Master, you see, actually congratulates us on our enemies, and backbiters, and false friends. He lifts us out of all our bitterness and gloom, despondency and resentment, up into the sunshine of His own humble, loving, forgiving heart. And as if His heavenly teaching were not enough, He leaves us His example: "Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in His steps. He committed no sin; no guile was found on His lips. When He was reviled, He did not revile in turn; when He suffered, He did not threaten; but He trusted to Him who judges justly." (1 Peter 2:21-23, RSV)

Come, then, my brethren, with all your wrongs and all your injuries, real and supposed, great and small; greatly exaggerated, and impossible to be exaggerated. And when you stand praying, spread them all out before God. Name them and describe them to Him. And He will hear you, and He will help you till you are able, with regard to the last and even the greatest of them, to say, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." (Luke 23:34)